Mental Block

Sitting up at 02h00 in the morning, trying to rock a child to sleep with rather large eyes, weird thoughts prick the consciousness.



Earlier in the day I had stepped into the pool after another hectic Judo session. I was hot and bothered and keen to cool down. The pool was cool bordering on cold. I slowly waded in until the water was at my waist. I had this feeling that I should dive in and at the same time an overwhelming resistance to that exact thought. I dove in, got wet and felt much better. We all know that it is far better to get in fast and acclimatise than to delay the inevitable. Yet for some reason, my mind prefers the later.


I wondered if this was happening more and more to me as I get older. The refusal of my mind to accept a leap of faith when the alternative is slow and unpleasant. The first thing that popped into my mind; dropping in on my halfpipe!


Just the other day, I took myself off to the Stellenbosch skate park. They have a tiny halfpipe outside for those wanting to learn this great skill. By tiny, I mean it is about a foot high. The one in my garden is just short of six feet high. I stood at the top of this little drop for more than thirty five minutes before I gave up. I was frozen on the lip with only my sweat dripping to the ground. Simply unable to make that small leap of faith in myself! I cannot express in words how my mind procrastinated any movement even though there was almost zero chance of injury. And then I gave up!!!


Walking to my car, I myself to be highly annoyed. Getting there I turned around determined to beat my own fear. At the ramp I found some dude sitting on the side having a smoke. Instead of making matters worse, my new audience of one forced me to make both the mental and physical leap. I dropped in easily! And then did it again, and again!


One foot down, six to go...


I think that same mental block crops up in many other situations in my life. But now I am ready and waiting for it to appear. I intend to take the bull by the horns, throw caution to the wind, and beat this fear back, one crazy moment at a time!