Reality is that life outside of my little bubble is incredibly tough. We talk about drugs and crime but there are people who have to live with this stuff every day. They get to walk past known drug dens, see youngsters with things that do not belong to them, and know that they will soon be selling them to fuel their habit. For some people these youngsters are their own children! They understand that these youngsters are on a path to destruction, not only of their own life, but the lives of all around them. And they are completely helpless to change a thing!
Last night I was at one of my monthly meetings and listened in dismay to the stories of one of the men there. The meeting was a pre-school management team meeting and he is one of the members of the team. He was retrenched just over a year ago and has not been able to find work in all that time. He still serves on our team even though his children have all left the school. A desperate man, yet a man with an incredibly positive attitude and a life full of integrity.
His story must mirror that of millions the world over. I can’t help feeling terrible that I cannot do more to help him. Or can I?
He shared a story about meeting someone who is trying to help others break the cycle of drug addiction, crime, and prison that the youth of area seem destined to share. He spoke of this person with amazement and awe. Somebody who has given up their own comforts to try and make a real difference in the lives of others!
I drove home asking myself many questions. Mainly, why am I living such a comfortable life? Is there not something more that I can do to help?
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Sunday, January 24, 2010
And she has grown!
10 weeks on and she is certainly a little bigger! She has found her smile and a whole range of other emotions that her face is enjoying expressing! She has also just discovered her hands. And whats in hands goes in mounth...
Thursday, January 21, 2010
2606km in 3 days
I had two business meetings to attend and it seemed to make sense to combine them both with a surf trip. The good folks of Bloemfontein marvelled at my surf board, as their rocky shores have probably not been surfed since the ice age! My second meeting in Port Elizabeth was the one I had my eye on as the drive back from Port Elizabeth to Cape Town is filled with world renowned surf spots. Alas it was not to be, the swell was epically small and my surfboard got to stay warm and confortable in its bag!
About a 1000km into this trip I had this marvellous idea that I should take photographs of the panaromic vistas that were spread before us like mouth watering delights. As such I missed the true Karoo scrub and the moon like feel of the Northern Cape. Oh well...we do live in a beautiful land!!
1106km - Not too far outside of Bloemfontein
1156km - still outside of Bloemfontein
1346km - Somewhere?
1587km - close to PE now
1760km - Seal Point in St Francis Bay - no waves (sniff)
2216km - a Sedgefield lagoon
2594km - Top of Sir Lowry's pass - so close to home!
Attack by Vicious Coffee Mug
The most extraordinary thing happened to me this morning.
On waking up I headed for the kitchen and proceeded with an activity that was being replicated in countless other households. The making of the first cup of coffee!
I don’t drink coffee but my wife loves her morning brew. She also has pretty specific requirements about how it is to be made. They go something like this; milk to be warmed in microwave for 40 seconds, kettle boiled, frothy device used to froth milk into a frenzy, 1 spoon Nescafe, 1.5 spoons brown sugar, then stirred not shaken! Getting the froth into the shape of a heart is a bonus!
I was simultaneously completing step one and two when I retrieved the coffee cup from the microwave. It happens the same way every morning except that this time it felt as if the mug slipped as I was about to put it down. It banged on the counter and exploded. That is correct, exploded! I was a little stunned and watched as milk dripped from cupboards and counters and lazily made its way to the floor. There it reencountered pieces of the coffee mug in its new guise of well distributed shattered shards.
My son on the other side of the kitchen was saying ‘ow’. Flying bits had peppered him on the legs. He was OK. As the milk seeped through my shorts, I realised that my hand was dripping with blood. My left hand, mind you, not the one that handled the mug. On further inspection I discovered a 2cm gash in the palm of my hand.
The first synapse to fire was the one that realised I would not be surfing this morning. Something I had spent days looking forward to. My son’s first response was to say that he was sorry I would not be able to do Judo this evening. A double blow!
I am now convinced that the moral of the story is that coffee is bad for your health! I am far safer surfing in a shark infested ocean!! Although perhaps not with a bleeding hand!
On waking up I headed for the kitchen and proceeded with an activity that was being replicated in countless other households. The making of the first cup of coffee!
I don’t drink coffee but my wife loves her morning brew. She also has pretty specific requirements about how it is to be made. They go something like this; milk to be warmed in microwave for 40 seconds, kettle boiled, frothy device used to froth milk into a frenzy, 1 spoon Nescafe, 1.5 spoons brown sugar, then stirred not shaken! Getting the froth into the shape of a heart is a bonus!
I was simultaneously completing step one and two when I retrieved the coffee cup from the microwave. It happens the same way every morning except that this time it felt as if the mug slipped as I was about to put it down. It banged on the counter and exploded. That is correct, exploded! I was a little stunned and watched as milk dripped from cupboards and counters and lazily made its way to the floor. There it reencountered pieces of the coffee mug in its new guise of well distributed shattered shards.
My son on the other side of the kitchen was saying ‘ow’. Flying bits had peppered him on the legs. He was OK. As the milk seeped through my shorts, I realised that my hand was dripping with blood. My left hand, mind you, not the one that handled the mug. On further inspection I discovered a 2cm gash in the palm of my hand.
The first synapse to fire was the one that realised I would not be surfing this morning. Something I had spent days looking forward to. My son’s first response was to say that he was sorry I would not be able to do Judo this evening. A double blow!
I am now convinced that the moral of the story is that coffee is bad for your health! I am far safer surfing in a shark infested ocean!! Although perhaps not with a bleeding hand!
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Arrrgggggg
I sit here blogging at 03h00 in the morning. Not probably my best time for blogging but yesterday will stand out for some time as a day that I realised I have no real control over my life. As a result you will have to forgive the graphic imagines!
The day was going swimmingly, my work effort was effortless, the kids were all busy, an advert was being shot in our front garden, and someone was coming over to check out our fridge. Yes for many months the fridge has been on the verge of breakdown, but just this week it has become more of a warm.
Anyhow lunch time rolled around and I heated up some leftover curry from a couple of nights ago. It tasted just fine, and I was soon back at my desk. Then it struck, a hot flush and bout of nausea. It made no sense and I was sure I would be right as rain in just a moment. Unfortunately I was soon in the bathroom moving my lunch onto a more comfortable location. I suspect a little food poisening as a result of a warm fridge and a couple of hot days!
One moment I had been fine and the next an uncomfortable shivering weak wreck. I lay on my bed hoping it would all pass. Instead my body allowed me hours of uncomfortable roiling in bed, while my poor wife got on with the joyous job of ‘day before school starts’ preparation.
Eventually I realised that there was no getting around me helping the last of the lunch, that was still lurking somewhere within me, to join its mates. I blogged a couple of weeks ago about taking the bull by the horns when needing to do something unpleasant. The unpleasant thing would then result in a far better situation; well here was another instance of exactly that. The old finger down the throat trick! It worked, and it was gruesome! It was not much longer and I was back for further conversations with Ralph, the big white telephone! Once again my side of the conversation had to be assisted. Although after this incident, I was able to pat Ralph on his head in thanks for all of his support.
All the time one thought keeps going through my mind. Pain I can handle but nausea and vomiting I cannot.
Oh God, comfort and soothe all of those poor people who are suffering this as a side effect from chemotherapy. My moment will pass but they have to deal with this for months!
The day was going swimmingly, my work effort was effortless, the kids were all busy, an advert was being shot in our front garden, and someone was coming over to check out our fridge. Yes for many months the fridge has been on the verge of breakdown, but just this week it has become more of a warm.
Anyhow lunch time rolled around and I heated up some leftover curry from a couple of nights ago. It tasted just fine, and I was soon back at my desk. Then it struck, a hot flush and bout of nausea. It made no sense and I was sure I would be right as rain in just a moment. Unfortunately I was soon in the bathroom moving my lunch onto a more comfortable location. I suspect a little food poisening as a result of a warm fridge and a couple of hot days!
One moment I had been fine and the next an uncomfortable shivering weak wreck. I lay on my bed hoping it would all pass. Instead my body allowed me hours of uncomfortable roiling in bed, while my poor wife got on with the joyous job of ‘day before school starts’ preparation.
Eventually I realised that there was no getting around me helping the last of the lunch, that was still lurking somewhere within me, to join its mates. I blogged a couple of weeks ago about taking the bull by the horns when needing to do something unpleasant. The unpleasant thing would then result in a far better situation; well here was another instance of exactly that. The old finger down the throat trick! It worked, and it was gruesome! It was not much longer and I was back for further conversations with Ralph, the big white telephone! Once again my side of the conversation had to be assisted. Although after this incident, I was able to pat Ralph on his head in thanks for all of his support.
All the time one thought keeps going through my mind. Pain I can handle but nausea and vomiting I cannot.
Oh God, comfort and soothe all of those poor people who are suffering this as a side effect from chemotherapy. My moment will pass but they have to deal with this for months!
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Average, not quite?
I had a conversation with one of my mates a couple of weeks ago. That in itself is not surprising! Surprising was that this chap claimed to be average and was quite upset about it.
Another mate immediately stepped up and told him that he had an incredible family life and was a great dad. Someone to be respected and looked up to for just those qualities as sadly they are unusual in the world. I think he was a little taken aback by this comment.
This world is a funny place. For the most part respect is generated by a thick wallet, a fancy car, labelled clothes, and a palatial home. Society loves these people; they have made it big and deserve to be our hero’s.
Or do they?
We have just seen Tiger Woods fall from grace. A man blessed with extra ordinary talent, who mastered a difficult game, and made it work for him. But we have seen that linked to that great talent was also a great weakness. Then there are pop icons like Britney Spears, plenty of cash but trailing a set of life disasters. Suffice to say there is not enough blog space to discuss the celebrity world and their issues. Money seems to be a wonderful thing, but I imagine it must magnify any weaknesses we may have. For most us, we will never get to find out the hard way.
It seems that there are two main directions one can take in life. Focus your life on the art of making money, although whether one succeeds or not is a different story! The other avenue is a life of service to one’s family and or community. It is rare to find anyone who has successfully married the two, although there are many philanthropists who make tons of money, discover that money is not everything, and then turn to helping out the world.
Path number two has no glamour, does not seem to be fun, allows for zero recognition, and includes much personal sacrifice. It is no wonder that few aspire to be the best at it! We need more people to step up and be average at the affairs of the world and brilliant with their families.
My ‘average’ mate is indeed blessed with a rare gift and is one of the few that actually deserves hero status!
Another mate immediately stepped up and told him that he had an incredible family life and was a great dad. Someone to be respected and looked up to for just those qualities as sadly they are unusual in the world. I think he was a little taken aback by this comment.
This world is a funny place. For the most part respect is generated by a thick wallet, a fancy car, labelled clothes, and a palatial home. Society loves these people; they have made it big and deserve to be our hero’s.
Or do they?
We have just seen Tiger Woods fall from grace. A man blessed with extra ordinary talent, who mastered a difficult game, and made it work for him. But we have seen that linked to that great talent was also a great weakness. Then there are pop icons like Britney Spears, plenty of cash but trailing a set of life disasters. Suffice to say there is not enough blog space to discuss the celebrity world and their issues. Money seems to be a wonderful thing, but I imagine it must magnify any weaknesses we may have. For most us, we will never get to find out the hard way.
It seems that there are two main directions one can take in life. Focus your life on the art of making money, although whether one succeeds or not is a different story! The other avenue is a life of service to one’s family and or community. It is rare to find anyone who has successfully married the two, although there are many philanthropists who make tons of money, discover that money is not everything, and then turn to helping out the world.
Path number two has no glamour, does not seem to be fun, allows for zero recognition, and includes much personal sacrifice. It is no wonder that few aspire to be the best at it! We need more people to step up and be average at the affairs of the world and brilliant with their families.
My ‘average’ mate is indeed blessed with a rare gift and is one of the few that actually deserves hero status!
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Too Tired to Surf?
Tuesday morning started beautifully. It was earlier than the sun and the world had that just new again look. The back of Table Mountain was just visible as it lay hunkered down across the bay. The beautiful colours of dawn seemed to have no effect on that slumbering giant.
In front of us the sea rumbled in apparent confusion, its size far smaller than that predicted by misinformed climatologists. Out of nowhere a lump of swell birthed a great wave onto the rocky shelf that we know as our local surf spot, Paranoia!
Without delay we were in the water, and somehow I managed to make some personal breakthroughs. Was it possible that my surfing was looking up, that I was moving onto the next level at last? After two hours of fun, I quit the watery rollercoaster and was back at my desk before 08h15. More than ready to tear into a new day!
Friday dawned with the promise of much bigger swell. With some trepidation I found myself looking at the same surf break. This morning the sea was angry, belching up big heaving waves that thundered spent energy. Without having taken a step, I felt exhausted, weeks of interrupted and fitful sleep having taken their toll. Ever up for the challenge, I suited up and paddled wearily into the frothing windswept melee that was the takeoff zone.
The waves were big, more than twice my height, and I struggled to catch any of them. And then by accident I caught a wave. It was big and exhilarating but even the intense adrenaline rush did little to fuel my slow and long paddle back.
Later a behemoth of a wave rolled on over to us. The surfer in front of me jumped off his board instead of duck diving under it. In my tired mind, I wondered why, until I noticed that his board looked like a matchstick in front of an avalanche of foam. With haste I followed suit and swam deep until I felt my leash strain against my leg as it took brunt of the waves force. Then I swam upwards for ages, feeling the pressure reduce on my ears but battling to get out of the writhing frothy cauldron of spent energy. Eventually it released me and I gratefully breathed some fresh salt infused air. My little strength remaining had been violently sapped. It was time to get out!
Somehow I caught the next wave and was shocked to see it lurch and explode in front of me. With no thought for my feelings, it swept me into its roiling self, surged onward, and spat me out down the rocky coast. Gasping! Not the exit that I had desired! Instead I paddled for the small rocky exit, eventually found purchase with my feet. I then carefully picked my slippery rocky trail with care, only to find myself unceremoniously thumped by an unhappy watery leftover of global warming. Landing on top of the thin part of my board, on top of three of my fingers, on top of a rock! The rock stood firm, whilst my fingers tried to squeeze themselves into my board. Thankfully, my board obliged.
A hard lesson learnt. Exhaustion is not to be fooled with in dangerous conditions. Perhaps the three neat grooves in the side of my surf board may remind me long after my swollen, bruised, and bloody fingers have healed!
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
Poverty of Spirit
The book I am reading has had me in tears from all of the laughter, much to my wife’s amusement! It is titled, ‘Around Africa on my bicycle’ and is written by the hero of the story, Riaan Manser. Riaan is the mad chap who pedalled around our small continent a couple of years ago, a mere 36,000 kilometres.
Having spent a fair bit of time working in Africa over the last 18 months, I have a different appreciation for Africa and its people. That might be why I have found his commentary so amusing. It might also be that he has written a thoroughly humorous book!
One of his insights really struck me. He writes about the many people that he met along the way, most of whom were very poor. Yet he found them to be full of joy and incredibly generous with the little that they had. He wondered if most people who are well off have the joy of their material possessions but have perhaps lost the joy of life and the spirit of humanity that makes life wonderful.
I think it is entirely plausible that the wealthy have too much invested in wealth to risk losing it all to find true happiness and joy. Wealth continually breeds the need for more wealth, at the expense of everything else! The same is true of those with nothing who have much invested in their joy of life to risk losing it to find wealth. Although the opportunities to make the change are probably limited! Each side has something wonderful and yet it seems that finding the happy medium is incredibly difficult.
Is it possible that poverty can refer not only to material things but also to one's spirit?
Perhaps if you have managed to build a life that if filled with love, joy, complete peace of mind, and just enough to survive on; you have found the elusive Holy Grail?
Having spent a fair bit of time working in Africa over the last 18 months, I have a different appreciation for Africa and its people. That might be why I have found his commentary so amusing. It might also be that he has written a thoroughly humorous book!
One of his insights really struck me. He writes about the many people that he met along the way, most of whom were very poor. Yet he found them to be full of joy and incredibly generous with the little that they had. He wondered if most people who are well off have the joy of their material possessions but have perhaps lost the joy of life and the spirit of humanity that makes life wonderful.
I think it is entirely plausible that the wealthy have too much invested in wealth to risk losing it all to find true happiness and joy. Wealth continually breeds the need for more wealth, at the expense of everything else! The same is true of those with nothing who have much invested in their joy of life to risk losing it to find wealth. Although the opportunities to make the change are probably limited! Each side has something wonderful and yet it seems that finding the happy medium is incredibly difficult.
Is it possible that poverty can refer not only to material things but also to one's spirit?
Perhaps if you have managed to build a life that if filled with love, joy, complete peace of mind, and just enough to survive on; you have found the elusive Holy Grail?
Monday, January 4, 2010
Christmas Cheer
Christmas has come and gone, as has 2009. Family have stayed and are now enjoying the peace of their homes. Christmas pies, gammons, and Christmas cake have all been enjoyed and consumed in great quantities. The extra chairs and tables are packed away and the extra large Tupperware is now clean and resting in the cupboard for the next Christmas excess.
Sadly I found Christmas to be an incredibly secular feast. The fact that we were supposedly celebrating the birth of Jesus Christ seemed to be lost on most people. The incredible significance of God coming to earth as man barely registered above the glut of food and presents! I could not help asking why non religious people celebrate Christmas? Is the allure of presents to great to pass up? Perhaps Christmas is one of the last vestiges of a by-gone religious era that no longer has relevance today?
I suppose that people have many reasons for celebrating a non religious Christmas. Although I wonder if non-Muslims celebrate Eid or non-Jewish people celebrate Passover? And then do they just partake in the fun stuff or is the fun stuff interwoven with the religious side?
In a bid to dilute my children’s expectation for presents, I dragged them along to our local soup kitchen on Christmas day. We helped to prepare food in the form of hotdogs and koeksisters as well as a small present. The present consisted of a bar of soap, a packet of biscuits, sweets, and a tin of cold drink. My boys helped to hand out these simple gifts to people from all walks of life. They got to see the genuine appreciation for something so small and hopefully learnt real lessons about the spirit of Christmas.
I received an unexpected Christmas present in the form of an old friend and his family who ended up sharing our Christmas celebration with us. My friend was also once my first boss, and somehow we have managed to nurture our relationship over many years. Our families certainly ensured that the day was lively and the real joy of family and friendship was shared.
Perhaps I have become too cynical! At least many already people celebrate this feast; perhaps I should be finding ways of topping it up with Christ!
Sadly I found Christmas to be an incredibly secular feast. The fact that we were supposedly celebrating the birth of Jesus Christ seemed to be lost on most people. The incredible significance of God coming to earth as man barely registered above the glut of food and presents! I could not help asking why non religious people celebrate Christmas? Is the allure of presents to great to pass up? Perhaps Christmas is one of the last vestiges of a by-gone religious era that no longer has relevance today?
I suppose that people have many reasons for celebrating a non religious Christmas. Although I wonder if non-Muslims celebrate Eid or non-Jewish people celebrate Passover? And then do they just partake in the fun stuff or is the fun stuff interwoven with the religious side?
In a bid to dilute my children’s expectation for presents, I dragged them along to our local soup kitchen on Christmas day. We helped to prepare food in the form of hotdogs and koeksisters as well as a small present. The present consisted of a bar of soap, a packet of biscuits, sweets, and a tin of cold drink. My boys helped to hand out these simple gifts to people from all walks of life. They got to see the genuine appreciation for something so small and hopefully learnt real lessons about the spirit of Christmas.
I received an unexpected Christmas present in the form of an old friend and his family who ended up sharing our Christmas celebration with us. My friend was also once my first boss, and somehow we have managed to nurture our relationship over many years. Our families certainly ensured that the day was lively and the real joy of family and friendship was shared.
Perhaps I have become too cynical! At least many already people celebrate this feast; perhaps I should be finding ways of topping it up with Christ!
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